


Amber Feathers

by acedragonqueen



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Destiel if you squint - Freeform, First Kiss, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Sabriel - Freeform, Slow Burn, Temporary Character Death, Wingfic, author hates themself for this, coming back to finish this after two years on a dare, like really squint, please forgive me it’s temporary
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-03-03
Updated: 2018-03-05
Packaged: 2018-03-16 02:11:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 17,295
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3470489
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/acedragonqueen/pseuds/acedragonqueen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Gabriel lighted down on the rooftop of a gas station. His legs swung lazily from the sign.</p><p>Gabriel groaned. If he hadn't given any reaction to Sam's compliment, no one would have thought anything. It wasn't even that big of a deal but he had gotten too flustered to think.</p><p>For Sam to compliment his wings. Gabriel believed he had found his Kryptonite. Gabriel's wings had been a great source of pride for him, though he rarely showed them to anyone. He was proud of their colors and brilliance, but part of him was scared to let people see. Wings were such an expressive part of an angel that if someone knew what a certain movement meant they could know exactly what an angel thought.</p><p>Sam didn't know that about angels but even the prospect was terrifying to Gabriel.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Go check out my Wattpad for original stories at SpacenerdLeliel if you enjoyed this!

"It's not funny!" A shout echoed from the bunker kitchen. "Keep dreaming Big Bird." The reply jeered. Sam looked up from cleaning his gun. A very feathery Gabriel stormed into the room with Dean behind sporting a wicked grin. Six glistening amber colored wings were bristling against Gabriel's back. It gave him the appearance of a very angry bird. The three of them had arrived back at the bunker hours ago after a hunt against a very old and very powerful witch. The witch must have dabbled in Enochian spells given the fact that whatever she had cast on Gabriel had revealed his wings.

"Sam do you know if dear old Cassie had found anything on hiding these?" Gabriel jerked a thumb towards the wings. "No. If Cas found something he'd go to his boyfriend first don't you think?" He responded with a smirk and a nod towards Dean.

"Not as funny as you think." Dean mumbled and threw a balled up t-shirt at Sam's face. "You're right it's hilarious." Sam grinned. Gabriel's wings fluttered in amusement.

"Damn that witch was powerful. She knew Enochian spells." Sam mused. He stood up and walked over to Gabriel. Sam reached out to touch one of the glimmering appendages but the wing flinched away. "No touching." Gabriel said, a familiar smirk stretching across his face.

"Well I'm gonna go down to the Gas-N-Sip and get road snacks and gas." Dean got up from where he had flopped down on the bed. The door closing signaled his departure.

"So Sam. What do you think of my wings? Dazzling and handsome like me?" Gabriel winked with a flirtatious smile. Sam rolled his eyes at Gabriel's antics. "I actually think they're kind of incredible." He confessed. Gabriel blinked in surprise. "Really?" The archangel asked a little stunned. Sam nodded. "Yeah. I mean look at them they're awesome. I've never seen something like feathers move so fluidly. They're mesmerizing." 

Gabriel blushed and the amber feathers suddenly puffed up like a bird's. "I- I have to go." He stuttered. Tripping over his own feet, Gabriel flew away, flustered. His wings being out in the open might be more difficult to deal with than he thought.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gabriel tries to stop being dramatic and fails miserably ft. Cas

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Coffee be my savior as I attempt to write more chapters in the future. I can't promise quality but at least I'm publishing again.

Gabriel lighted down on the rooftop of a gas station. His legs swung lazily from the sign.

 _I fucked up_.

Gabriel groaned. If he hadn't given any reaction to Sam's compliment, no one would have thought anything. It wasn't even that big of a deal but he had gotten too flustered to think.

For Sam to compliment his wings. Gabriel believed he had found his Kryptonite. Gabriel's wings had been a great source of pride for him, though he rarely showed them to anyone. He was proud of their colors and brilliance, but part of him was scared to let people see. Wings were such an expressive part of an angel that if someone knew what a certain movement meant they could know exactly what an angel thought.

Sam didn't know that about angels but even the prospect was terrifying to Gabriel.

 _I shouldn't have overreacted_.

Sam might now suspect something. He might not know what, but the possibility was there.

"Gabriel?" A voice asked from behind him. Gabriel didn't need to turn to know it was Cas.

"Hey bro." He didn't try to even attempt a smile. He was too stressed.

"You don't look okay. What's wrong?" Cas asked as he swayed awkwardly. Gabriel stood up, swinging his legs back over the sign.

"Sam said something about my wings, I overreacted and flew away. It wasn't even that big of a deal I just blew it out of proportion." Gabriel huffed.

"Something bad?" Cas said with concern.

"Nah, the exact opposite in fact. He called them amazing." Cas frowned.

"Then I don't see the problem."

"Exactly! There is no problem, I just got flustered and left like an idiot. But leaving in such a rush could make him suspicious because I'm acting like a school girl with a crush." Gabriel threw his hands in the air with frustration.

"So that's what this is about. Your feelings for Sam." Cas gave him a knowing smile that Gabriel had to admit was a frightening sight on him.

"Stop making that face, you'll give someone the impression that you're not a starry eyed dork." Gabriel said affectionately to his brother.

Cas laughed quietly.

Gabriel turned to the sky and his wings spread as he scanned the gray storm clouds pensively. He missed times like this. A certain calm washed over him. He and Cas would watch the storm clouds from Heaven rolling over the Earth with a certain fascination when Castiel was just a fledgling. Before Gabriel had left.

"You should tell him."

Gabriel snorted with laughter. "Fuck no. That's a horrible idea."

"Is it?" Castiel said with a look.

"Cas on the list of bad ideas you've had that ranks next to becoming God."

Cas glared.

"Just saying." Gabriel shoved his hands in his pockets.

"You should though Gabriel. Sam cares about you, even if you can't see it. You have always taken risks, thrown yourself into the fray of this chaotic world. And here you hesitate." Cas placed a comforting hand on Gabe's right wing. "You've taught me so much over the years. Take some advice from me now brother."

Gabriel sighed. The sound was accompanied by the fluttering of Castiel's wings as he disappeared.

Gabriel took one last look at the storm clouds. A last moment of peace.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this in half an hour screw coherent writing.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I need sleep finals are going to kill me I know nothing.

When Gabriel got back to the bunker, Sam and Dean were found playing beer pong on the map table (although Gabe wasn't sure if that was the name of it, map table worked well enough).

"Hey, look who's back." Dean said as they noticed Gabe enter. "Want any?" He held out a bottle to Gabriel who took it, popped the cap, and downed the liquid in one swig.

"Jeez." Sam said putting his ping pong ball on the table in shock. "Stressed much?"

"Yeah just a little." Gabriel said sarcastically.

"Well uh," Sam handed Gabriel a ping pong ball, "Join us."

Gabe sighed. He took a lazy shot and the ball hit its mark, even without him using magic. Then he began to walk away from the table. 

Sam made a strange noise and made a face of confusion at Dean.

"I'll go talk to Cas. Leave you two alone." He said with a smirk.

Sam mouthed I-hate-you to which Dean just laughed and left.

"Gabe wait." Sam jogged after Gabriel as he walked towards his room.

"Is there something you need Samuel? Because I'm a little busy right now if you haven't already figured it out." He whirled around to stare furiously at the taller man. Sam shrunk when Gabriel used his full name. Gabe never did that and his voice was treading dangerously into a shaking rage.

Sam took a deep breath. For a moment he was tempted to back down. To let it go and give Gabriel space to cool down. But he'd had it with the way Gabriel just shrugged it all off.

"Yes there is something I need. I need to know what the hells going on with you." Sam said in a calm but firm voice. Gabriel raised an eyebrow.

"There's nothing going on." He turned away again but Sam caught his arm. Gabriel stared down at Sam's hand until he let go.

"Tell me the truth Gabe. Please."

Gabriel looked around as if escaping would get him out of the question before sighing. "Can we talk about it somewhere else?"

Sam shrugged. "If that's what you need."

Gabe paused before snapping his fingers and teleporting them away.

Sam looked around. "Where are we?"

They were standing in an enormous foyer of a beautiful house. Although it was less of a house and more of a mansion. With a stunning polished floor and columns of marble by the front door leading to a grand staircase of wood. 

"One of my many hideouts around the globe. Like it? I built it myself." Gabe said with pride.

Sam smiled. "It's, awesome to say plainly."

"Come here." The archangel lead Sam into an area off of the entrance. It seemed to be outside although Sam wasn't sure where outside was. It appeared to be a secret garden. Flora of all kind grew around. The plants were grown in patterns and created their own pathway to a bench in the center of the garden. A fountain bubbled in the center of one of the planters. A stream wound around the fountain with large stones creating a natural bridge over. 

"This is beautiful." Sam said. Gabe stared at him as he dipped his hand in the water. Gabriel felt his feathers fluff up suddenly and he brushed them down quickly with embarrassment.

He motioned for Sam to follow him to the bench and they sat down. Gabriel tucked his wings under him.

"So are you going to tell me what's up?" Sam asked. Gabriel half hoped he would forget why they were there. 

"Ever since my wings were revealed, I've been a bit on edge." He explained truthfully. "It's because-"

Sam looked intently at him as he answered and Gabriel had to smooth his feathers down again.

"It's because if my wings are out they're more vulnerable to monsters." He said with a rush. The lie felt bitter on his tongue but he said it with confidence and ease.

"Oh." 

"Yeah. As an archangel, it's difficult to hurt me but with my wings visible like this, its 10 times more dangerous for me. Not an enjoyable feeling." Gabriel decided to take this twist and run with it. It was true that his wings made him feel vulnerable but it would actually be much easier to fight with them out.

"Why didn't you just tell us Gabe? You don't even need to leave the bunker until we find a reversal spell if you feel unsafe. We could help you." Sam asked.

"I guess I thought it was something I could deal with on my own. A fear I could push down until I didn't have to worry about it. It's easier to hide than to be vulnerable and open to pain." Gabriel wasn't so sure he was talking about his wings anymore. 

Sam gave a pained look. "You're not alone Gabe. You've got a family here. Cas, Dean-" He gestured to the air. "Me."

Gabriel felt his feathers rise once again and didn't bother to brush them down.

"It's not just you Gabe. No matter what you're going through, we're here." For a moment Gabriel could only stare at Sam before he launched himself at him and pulled him into a tight hug. Sam was caught off guard before he began to hug back.

"Thank you Sam." Gabriel said gratefully as he pulled back. 

"No problem Gabe." Sam's hand still rested comfortable on Gabriel's arm before he stood up. "Wanna see who can balance better? No magical cheating?" Gabriel rolled his eyes but didn't back down from the challenge

He walked to the stream and placed a foot carefully on the first stone. Gabriel stood up after him. Sam attempted to cross the stone bridge and Gabe watched as he stepped with care and grace. Sam looked back and gave him a cheeky smile. "Your turn Gabe." But right before Gabriel could step forward Sam yelped.

Suddenly Sam had slipped on a slightly wet stone and before he fell into the water he felt something pull him back up. Gabriel had rushed over and caught him by the waist. His feathers were flared out in obvious fear and Sam wondered if the wings had meaning in other movement. As Gabriel pulled him up they both had to balance on the same rock. Sam noticed the short distance between them. Short enough that he was pressed chest to chest.

"I-" Gabriel's wings were no longer flared out but instead incredibly fluffy.

After a moment of awkward silence he stepped onto another rock. 

"Didn't mean to crowd you." He stuttered.

"It's ok." Sam breathed out a breath he didn't realize he'd been holding.

"I should get us back." Gabriel said. 

They walked back to the foyer in silence. Before Gabriel could raise a hand to teleport them home, he held out a key to Sam who looked at in confusion.

"If you use this on any lock it will bring you here." Gabriel explained without the question. "If you need a place to get away."

Sam was about to thank him but then they disappeared and landed in the bunker. Only Gabriel wasn't anywhere to be seen and Sam stood alone in the library. He stared at the key in his hand before pocketing it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Why did I write this is the obvious question but the true one is why I continued to write it.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter will be more from Sam's perspective than Gabriel's so whoopdeedo let's go!

"So what happened?" Dean asked when he found Sam a little after Gabriel had returned him.

Sam shrugged. "Not much. He took me to a house of his and talked. I think he's just working through some things."

"Hold on, he has a house?" Dean asked incredulously and when Sam didn't respond he whistled with respect. "Wow."

"Dean he's scared." Sam said plainly, slumping down in his chair. "His wings are vulnerable like this and he's used to being powerful and relatively invincible. Gabe hasn't had to deal with this kind of fear and he... he needs our support."

Pulling a chair up next to him, Dean sat down by Sam. At first he thought Dean would make a joke or snide comment about Gabriel given the fact their friendship was mostly joking and light teasing. But instead Dean simply said, "What does he need?"

Sam thought for a moment. "I don't know. I think for now we just need to be willing to listen and provide help when he needs it." Dean nodded with understanding.

Silence filled the space for a moment.

"Well if that's all, I'm going to go relax for a bit." Dean tapped a cassette tape in his hand then got up and walked to his room.

Sam sat on his own. He kept dwelling on where Gabriel had taken him. The garden was so calming, the beams of sunlight making the place warm and welcoming. The sweet aroma of flowers and other exotic plants filling the air. He pulled the key Gabe had given him out of his pocket and fiddled with it. He wondered for a moment if he should go back. Gabe did give him permission to come anytime after all.

Before logic could over rule him he jogged up the steps to the bunkers entrance. He insert the key in the lock and turned.

As he opened the doorway, he was met with the sight of the mansions foyer once again.

Sam walked up the front stairs until he reached the first level.

It lead to a long hallway that was covered with doors and paintings. Some doors had labels while others did not.

"Gabe!" He called down each end of the hall. No response. Sam tried again but the archangel didn't answer.

Sam suddenly spotted a double door down at the far end of the left side of the hallway.

He looked around before he decided to screw it all and just go to the door.

When he swung the door open, he wasn't prepared for the sight of the glorious library on the other side.

It was just how he'd imagine the library from Beauty and the Beast. Sam was astounded at the sheer amount of books in there. He didn't take Gabriel for much of a reader but this suggested otherwise.

There was a table that stretched along the length of the room directly in the center. At the moment it was littered with books, papers, and candy wrappers. Sam picked up one of the papers.

He was stunned to see it was Gabriel's handwriting, only a little more frantic and hastily written. They looked like notes, scribbled during research.

Sam flipped over one book to read the cover.

 _ **Encyclopedia of Avian Wing Care**_.

"Huh." Sam mused aloud. He skimmed the first few pages that Gabriel had marked with sticky notes. He gave another glance to Gabriel's notes.

By the looks of it, he had been doing research on how to reverse the spell on his wings too.

Sam checked the index until a particular section caught his eye.

 ** _Angel Wings and How to Understand Them_**. What that meant, Sam wasn't sure.

He found the page the section started on and started to read.

'Years of studies have gathered information regarding the meanings of certain angelic displays. Though much is still unknown, the following research was obtained by a close connection between myself and an angel.'

Sam understood 'myself' to be the author but he wondered who the angel was. His question was quickly answered as he continued.

'Shamshiel, gave me much insight over the years. She eventually trusted me enough to bestow the knowledge upon me of the meanings of angelic wings displays.

An angels emotions are tied directly to their wings and are shown most prominently through these displays.

When an angel flares out their wings wide above them it's a sign of anger. But if the feathers are flat it's fear.

If an angel tucks their wings close to themself it's a clear sign of discomfort. If the feathers are flattened as well, it can be assumed that they are afraid.

Feathers can show emotions too. Such as when an angel feels happiness, its feathers may ruffle slightly.

Shamshiel took much convincing to delve this display to me. Puffed feathers mean an angel feels-'

Sam whipped his head around as the door clicked and opened. Gabriel walked through, looking tired and worn.

When Gabriel caught sight of Sam he startled and his wings flared out in what Sam remembered as fear.

"What-"

"I was looking for you." Sam said cautiously, closing the book behind his back. "I uh- I found your notes here about fixing your wings." He shuffled with the papers awkwardly and Gabe looked like a deer in the headlights more with each passing moment.

"What did you read?" He asked, eyes still wide with panic.

"Just the papers. Why?"

"No reason. Some of the books are just delicate from age." Gabriel said hastily. "Takes a careful hand to handle them."

They stood awkwardly for a moment.

"You were looking for me?" Gabe broke the silence.

"Oh yeah. I was going to ask if you needed any other help with things, you kind of just dropped me there." Sam said rubbing the back of his neck.

"No, I'm fine."

Another awkward pause.

"I should go." Sam said, making his way towards the door.

As he passed Gabriel, an arm shot out to grab his.

Gabriel stared at Sam with that same panicked expression, feathers puffed out severely. But he didn't say anything. It looked like he was trying to form words but nothing came out. Eventually he gave up and let Sam's arm go.

"I'll see you later." He shoved his hands in the pockets of his olive jacket and stalked towards the table. Sam gave him once last glance before leaving.

As Sam stepped out into the hallway, he took a deep breath to slow his racing heart. He wasn't sure why it was beating so quickly. He decided to blame it on the scare Gabriel had given him from walking in the room.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Actually typing this chapter on a computer? Unheard of.

The world might be depressing and everything seemed like shit, but at least there were chicken nuggets.

Gabriel dropped a nugget into the McDonalds box vehemently. Why did he bother?

He had piles of notes about his wings and spells and things even he didn't entirely understand. Hundred year old books that gave him little insight on a reversal to the spell the witch had used. The most frustrating thing being that he had no idea what spell she had used. No known spells described what she had done. The most he knew was that it was Enochian, nothing more.

Gabriel groaned. It seemed hopeless. It had been hours since Sam had left and he had buried himself in his books again. Gabriel just wanted his wings to go back to normal. The spell didn't seem to be wearing off and there wasn't any way they knew to reverse it. He would be stuck with his wings like this forever. And for him that meant a very long time.

Gabriel's wings would be out in the open to analyze and observe. If anyone figured out what his displaying meant...

Sam had come close today. When he had come back, when he had looked through Gabriel's notes. If he had read one of the books, or a scribble in the margins of his notes, Gabe would have been found out.

He snatched up one of the papers as he thought that and aggressively crossed out the lines of ink where he had written his frustrations about his wings.

The glimmering wings folded in around him. Like a golden blanket. He combed his fingers through the feathers lazily, head resting on his other palm with his knees tucked up to his chest.

' _I have to figure something out_.' He thought.

Sam had definitely noticed his strange behavior to the point that he had become concerned. Gabriel would need to act more like normal. Recently he'd been more grumpy and irritable than his usual laughing self.

He tossed his remaining chicken nuggets into a wastebasket and spun around in his chair. A lollipop replaced the nuggets in his hand.

' _Fuck. Fuck fucking fuck_.' He was tired. Angels didn't get tired but Gabriel felt like napping.

He ran a hand through his hair and sighed before sticking the lollipop in his mouth.

Maybe Cas had been right. Maybe he should tell Sam how he felt. If Sam rejected him he could change his identity and hide in another country for the next couple of decades. Which seemed like very a very sound solution.

Gabriel tapped his fingers on the table rhythmically. Then he pushed himself forcefully back and out of the chair. Stalking across the library to the door, Gabriel flung it open and marched down the hall. He jumped down multiple steps at a time until he reached the bottom and with a snap of his fingers, left the mansion.

\---

When he landed in the bunker, it was oddly quiet. He checked Sam's room, then Dean's. Nobody. Not even Cas was around. Gabriel went into the garage and saw the Impala that Dean cherished so much was missing too. It might've been safe to say they had gone out for a bit at that point and Gabriel began to worry a little less.

He turned on his phone and saw one voicemail message left by Sam. He hadn't heard it go off when he was away but it was stamped to have been sent an hour ago.

Gabriel played the message. "Hey Gabe, I don't know when you'll get this but we got wind of a case nearby that seemed kinda urgent so we thought we'd swing on by to check it out. I'm not sure we'll be back but feel free to drop by and lend a hand if you want." There was a pause and Gabriel checked to see if the message had ended before Sam continued. "Actually you could probably stay there, I forgot about your wings for a moment." Sam sounded apologetic. "So um, I'll see you when we get back okay? Bye." There was another pause and then the voicemail stopped.

Gabriel gave a huff. He knew he had told Sam his wings were vulnerable to monsters but that didn't mean he couldn't help out even if they actually were.

He opened his messages and shot a text to Sam.

'So where's this case of yours Sammich?'

Five minutes later, he was answered by Sam calling him.

"We think it's demons. I'll send you the address but you should be careful if you're going to come. Your wi-"

"Is that all Sam?" Gabriel instantly regretted snapping at him.

Sam was silent.

"Be careful when you arrive Gabriel. I don't want you getting hurt." And the call ended. A moment later, Sam texted him the address. Gabriel flew there instantly.

Gabe gave a start when he realized it was night. He had landed in the garden of some white picket fence house below a window. The sky was dark and the house lights were on. Suddenly Sam and Dean crept around the corner, Cas in tow with his angel blade at the ready. Sam and Dean had their guns raised cautiously and looked like they were about to fire before they realized who had just flown in.

Dean motioned at Gabriel to move over to them. He slipped quietly under the window towards them. "We just finished canvasing the place. It's not just one demon like we thought, it's a dozen of the bastards." Dean hissed. Gabriel nodded with understanding and slid his archangel blade out from his coat sleeve. He held it out, ready to strike.

"So what's the plan boys? Guns blazing or ninja style?" He asked with a grin.

"Neither." Sam piped up. "You and I are going to make a big scene. Lure them out. Dean and Cas will head in from the back and take out the stragglers and we all converge in the front." Gabriel thought the plan sounded reasonable.

"How exactly do we plan on making a scene?"

"That's kind of your thing isn't it asshole?" Dean smirked. Since Gabriel had apologized for the whole Mystery Spot ordeal, he and Dean had developed a strange friendship that included pranks and harmless insults.

"Fair point."

Cas and Dean disappeared back around the corner as everyone agreed on the plan. Sam tapped Gabriel's hand for him to follow. As they snuck back under the window, Gabriel in front, Sam suddenly pressed a hand on his wings in an effort to keep them out of sight of anyone inside. Gabriel jumped violently and made an inhuman noise. Something moved inside. Gabriel and Sam flattened themselves to the side of the building, Sam slapping a hand over Gabriel's mouth to keep him quiet. Gabriel glared at him. After a brief moment, it seemed safe to move.

Sam pointed to the porch of the house. There was an older man sitting in a chair, apparently asleep. Gabriel saw the swirling black mass inside him though.

"Demon." He whispered, to which Sam gave a nod of understanding.

"Do you have a distraction idea?" Sam asked Gabriel who winked.

"You betcha Samsquatch."

Gabriel snuck silently past the sleeping demon until he stood directly on the pathway to the door in the front yard. Then, raising his wings as high as he could, the plumage shimmering in the dim light of the house, he yelled.

The sleeping demon immediately woke up and launched himself at Gabriel, who speared him on his blade. The body fell to the ground and Sam crouched at the edge of the porch as two more demons came out to investigate. He lunged out at them and used the demon knife to quickly dispose of them. Footsteps could be heard stomping through the house.

"Ooh it's about to be a party." Gabriel said eagerly. Another group of demons came pouring out of the house. Gabriel began to wield his blade, stabbing demons left and right. A demon with 'edgy' tattoos inked across his face snarled at him right before light poured through his skeleton as he died. Sam landed continuous punches on a demon who had knocked the demon knife away from him.

One grunted as she struggled to get out of Gabriel's range. She kicked at his legs which made him fall swiftly to the ground and pinned him. The demon yanked his blade from his hand as Gabriel thrashed about wildly, frantically. She gave a wicked smile, and then carved a sigil in Gabriel's chest. He screamed. Suddenly he couldn't move. Sam shouted something but he couldn't tell what. Just when he thought things couldn't get worse another two demons came out of the house, parading around with Dean and Cas who were without weapons. Sam was grabbed by another demon.

"Look at what we have here." She crooned. "The Winchesters and their pet angels. What a wonderful surprise."

Sam and Dean looked defiantly while Cas glared. Gabriel felt helpless. He was motionless yet aware of everything. It was as if someone had hacked his vessel.

"I think we're going to have a lot of fun with you boys before we turn you over to the King." She smirked with perfect white teeth, red lipstick stretched in a poisonous smile.

Gabriel spared one last glance at Sam before the demon hit him and everything went dark.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> me:*uses one large word I haven't before* this is the epitome of sophisticated writing
> 
> I was kind of debating whether or not to make it go in this direction because it seems like too many plot lines to deal with but you know what i've already written it without a plan b thats a quick fix so here y'all go


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not too sure where this plot is going but let's see where the ride takes us. (100% honest I don't plan this out before hand. Just bear with me and I'll write something coherent eventually)

When Gabriel woke up, his whole body ached.  He winced at the throbbing pain in his head.  He slowly lifted his head up even though it felt like a heavy weight upon his shoulders.

 

Sam and Dean were tied up in chairs across from him.  Gabriel looked for Cas before realizing he was tied to a chair behind him.  Gabriel gave a start as he saw the demon that had taken him down was the one monologuing to the Winchesters.  Sam had a dirty rag shoved in his mouth and a furious glare set across his face.  Gabe chuckled as he realized they must've gagged him for talking back.  Sam certainly was a stubborn one.  Dean was making sarcastic retorts to the demon and she looked like she was about to gag him too.

 

Gabriel felt a rush of cold as he heard something the demon said.

 

"...Archdemon..."

 

He lurched in his chair, attempting to flair his wings out but they were pinned with ropes.  Cas made a noise and the Winchesters noticed he was awake.  The demon turned to him, her cold smile widening.

 

"It looks like the little birdie is awake.  Nice of you to finally join us." She sneered.  Gabriel spat in her face.  She recoiled and snarled at him.

 

He struggled to free his wings.  They were held down by flimsy rope which snapped under the pressure of his wings straining outwards.  The ropes tying him to the chair were a little more difficult.  Enochian sigils were burned into the rope.  The demon laughed as Gabriel stood up, still tied to the chair.  "Good luck getting out of those."  He narrowed his eyes before slamming himself full force onto the ground on his back.  The ropes may have been magically binding but the chair was not.  It splintered and the absence of the chair was enough to give Gabriel space to slip out.

 

But as he made to cut Cas free the demon grabbed him by the throat and held him up so that his feet left the ground.  Gabriel struggled to break her grip but couldn't.  His eyes widened in fear as her grip tightened.  "You are really beginning to test my patience."

 

"Who are you?" He choked out.

 

"Honestly, you break into my house and kill my friends, you could at least have the courtesy to recognize me."  She rolled her eyes.  Gabriel tried by he couldn't figure out who she was.  She leaned forward and whispered in his ear.  "Does the name Rory ring any bells?"  Cas turned as far in his chair as he could.  

 

"You're the archdemon's child?"  He asked in shock.  "You're supposed to be dead."

 

"They're supposed to be dead and look at where they are." She cocked her head to Sam and Dean.  "You killed my father.  Rory was a good person.  He wasn't like the rest of his kind." She snarled at Gabe.

 

"I had nothing to do with that." Gabriel hissed between clenched teeth.  His voice became deadly, far different from the humorous tone he normally had.  It made him sound like the age old powerful being he truly was.  

 

"I was there!" The demon shouted, suddenly furious tears pouring down her face.  "I saw you!  You killed him."

 

"Gabriel?" Cas said quietly.  Gabriel looked over to Sam and lowered his head when he saw him staring with sad questioning eyes.

 

Gabe swallowed tightly.  "Rory was in over his head.  It was his fault alone that he died."  The demon scoffed and threw him to the ground.  Gabriel winced as sharp pain gave him a bitter reminder of the sigil carved on his stomach.  He guessed it let her control him.  Which would be why he couldn't move again.  And she still had his sword.  She held it calmly, tracing the blade lightly over her palm.  Then she swiftly cut her thumb.  Blood flowed freely from the wound.  The crimson liquid dripped on the floor in small droplets.   She stalked over to him, her boot heels clicking on the concrete.  Concrete.  Gabriel raised his head for a moment to realize they were trapped in a warehouse.  It explained the darkness.  The only way to let light in was some shattered windows that were poorly covered with tarp.

 

"You know what I'm going to do to you?" She asked.  "I'm going to carve up that pretty little face of yours, and then I'm going to let that Grace of yours burn out before your friends eyes, so they know how it feels to see someone they love die in front of them."  Cas made a strangled sound and Sam shouted something behind his gag.   

 

"No!" Dean shouted.

 

"Aw Deano.  I always knew you cared." Gabriel winked at him, trying to stop them from worrying, but the joke was short lived as she slashed the archangel's blade across Gabe's face.  He hissed as blood and Grace shone across his cheek along the cut.

 

Sam fought against his restraints and Cas tried to free himself from the chair.

 

"I'm almost glad you killed my 'friends' though." The demon remarked.  "I had them under the impression that I was going to turn you over to that pathetic wreck of a king Crowley, but this is a much more poetic fate.  They would've caught on eventually to my real intentions but you saved me the trouble of killing them myself."

 

She traced the blade along his jawline, just deep enough to break the skin.  Gabriel huffed out a breath to steady himself as more of his Grace streamed out momentarily.  Another slash across the bridge of his nose, above his eyebrow, one missing the corner of his mouth.  Blood began to stain his jacket.  He closed his eyes.  After millennia of hiding and living and running from things, he finally stood up for something.  And it was about to get him killed.  He opened his eyes to spare a glance at Sam who was watching with a horrified expression on his face.  

 

"Okay, fun's over.  I'm getting bored."  She twirled his blade lazily in her hand before slashing it across his chest with lightning speed.  He couldn't even cry out.  Couldn't even make a sound.  As she towered over him, poised like a snake about to strike, she was interrupted by a loud  _crack_!  Cas had smashed his chair on the floor in a manner similar to Gabriel.  Now free, he launched himself at the demon.  Gabriel realized Dean had been so quiet about it all because he himself was working on discretely cutting his ropes away with a small pocketknife.  Dean's ropes fell away and he quickly cut Sam free too.  Sam pulled the rag out of his mouth and rushed over to Gabriel while Dean went to help Cas.  Sam gently took Gabriel's jacket off and used it to soak up the blood from the large gash on his chest.  Gabriel winced at the pressure as Sam helped him stand.  

 

"Guys come on!' He shouted to Dean and Cas.  Cas swiftly grabbed the blade from the demons hands as Dean delivered a painful kick to her ribs.  "Lets go." 

 

The demon groaned and coughed as she tried to sit up, talking through bloodstained teeth.  "I will find you.  And I will take everything from yo-" She was cut off as Dean drove the demon knife deep into her sternum.  Golden light flashed within her skeleton before she crumpled to the ground, dead.

 

"Sorry what was that?  Didn't quite catch it bitch." He said, wiping the blade clean on his shirt.

 

Gabriel clutched onto Sam as they hobbled out of the warehouse.  Cas handed him his blade which Gabriel gratefully took.  Sam helped him into the car while Dean muttered something about getting blood on his seats.  But there was no venom behind the words.  Cas sat in shotgun for once so Sam could keep an eye on Gabe.  Sam squeezed his hand gently and checked on his wound.  "You're going to be okay Gabe.  You're going to be okay." 

 

Those were the last words he heard before, once again, he passed out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please leave a kudos or comment if you enjoyed reading this, it really helps motivate me to write more! Finals are done kicking my ass so now that summer is here, expect many more chapters much more frequently. Probably a few a week depending on how bad my writers block gets.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm swamped with art I need to do and all of this writing so sorry if these chapters update a little slow, summer has been a big of a slow start.

"-suspect it lifted when she died." Gabriel could hear a voice saying as he woke up. He recognized it as Cas' deep tone.

 

"Hey guys. What'd I miss?" He wheezed out, blinking his eyes to clear them.

 

"Holy shit." Dean laughed quietly. "We thought you were a goner dude."

 

"Gabriel. How are you feeling?" Cas asked as he leaned into Gabriel's vision. Gabriel frowned, wincing as it pulled at the cuts on his face. Which had been bandaged? He touched a hand to his cheek. Someone had cleaned up most of the cuts and gashes. As he attempted to sit up, he felt the wound across his chest smart. He hissed and clenched his fist into bedsheets. "Take it easy." Cas warned and gently helped him sit up. "You're still not healed completely. The damage will take time to repair. They were pretty bad wounds." He cast a look at Dean who looked almost solemn for a moment. Gabriel watched the two exchange a silent conversation.

 

"Where's Sam?" Gabe asked. He looked around the room. His room. They had put him in his claimed bedroom in the bunker. Not that he needed it, but it was nice to have somewhere to himself like this. Somehow it was more comforting than his other hideaways sometimes.

 

"Sam is outside. He has been taking care of you for the past few days when I'm not in checking on you." Castiel said. Now Gabriel was really confused.

 

"Days? How long have I been out?"

 

"About a week today. You almost got turned into an angel smoothie dude, we thought it would take longer for you to wake up." Dean remarked, leaning against the small desk Gabriel had placed across from his bed. Gabriel slumped back, pain once again shooting through him and he flinched, which only made the pain worse. Cas stilled him.

 

A whole week. In comparison to his lifespan, it was barely anything, but when he was on Earth, time felt different. Minutes, hours, days, they all mattered. It was terrifying to think that he had been injured enough to be in a coma that long. He knew his injuries were bad, hell he was reminded of it constantly from the pain. But a week seemed like forever. And the demon having his sword terrified him too. She had come so close to killing him for something he never even did. Gabriel whimpered. A strange sound coming from him. Cas and Dean looked at each other with worry. 

 

"I'll get Sam." Dean said quietly as Cas stroked Gabriel's wings to comfort him. Gabriel noticed that the plumage which had been coated with layers of blood, were now cleaned and shimmering again. He frowned. 

 

"Did you clean my wings?" Gabriel asked, pointing at the feathers. Castiel suddenly appeared very guilty. 

 

"Sam thought you would be happier with wings not covered in blood, so he decided to clean them while you were unconscious." He paused. "I only helped a little."

 

"You let him touch my wings?" Gabriel shrieked suddenly becoming frantic for a moment before Sam and Dean stepped back into the room. Sam looked relieved to see Gabriel awake.

 

"How are you feeling?" He asked. Gabriel regained his composure and offered a small grin.

 

"Like beaten crap. But thats everyday with you guys isn't it?" He joked and that seemed to make Sam feel better to see him joking. 

 

"You should rest."

 

Gabriel laughed, ignoring the sharp pain in his chest. "I had a weeks worth of rest. I think I just need to move around a bit." He shakily got out of the bed and Cas frowned at him indicating he was opposed to the idea but Gabriel straightened up anyway. "See? I'm gonna be fine Samsquat-" He didn't get to finish his statement as his legs gave out under him and he fell like a sack of potatoes. Only to be caught by flannel covered arms. Sam had lunged forward to catch him. Gabriel laughed weakly. "Keyword 'gonna'." Sam rolled his eyes. 

 

"What would it take to convince you to rest?" Sam asked, knowing Gabriel was too stubborn to do it without persuasion.

 

Gabriel pretended to think for a moment. "Let me think. Hmmm. How about a Sugar Daddy?" Sam made a face.

 

"A what?"

 

"You know, giant-stick-of-caramel-take-your-teeth-out kind of candy. It's awesome." He grinned.

 

"Fine. Could I find one at a gas station?" Sam asked. Gabriel nodded. "You two keep an eye on him while I go get it." Sam pointed to Dean and Cas who both nodded while Cas gave an awkward thumbs up. It made Gabriel laugh which put him in pain again. Sam held him a little more gently. Gabe was about to try and hobble himself back to the bed when Sam picked him up in one swoop. He squeaked and Sam placed him carefully on the bed. "Don't go exerting yourself and getting hurt." He warned.

 

"Sure thing Doc." Gabriel said cheekily although his heart was beating a little faster than normal. 

 

"I mean it Gabe." Sam called back at him as he left the room. Dean handed Sam the keys and followed him out of the room. He heard them talking in the hallway but didn't strain himself trying to listen. Cas sat vigilantly next to him. When Dean returned he and Cas shared a knowing smile.

 

"You two and that silent communication thing. It's creepy because I know you're not actually using telepathy Cas." Gabriel quipped. Cas chuckled.

 

"We are merely agreeing that you and Sam act like a- what did you call it?"

 

"Married couple." Dean added with a smirk.

 

Gabriel rolled his eyes. "I've been married before and that- that is not acting like a married couple."

 

Dean looked shocked. "Who'd you tie the knot with?'

 

"Pagan stuff. A relationship I'm glad didn't survive the divorce." He grimaced. Pulling the covers gingerly over himself, he settled into the bed. "The other gods didn't know who to side with cause it was all like some big stupid family." He slurred, yawning. "Still care about them all a little though." Gabriel closed his eyes and felt himself drifting off.

 

\----

 

When he woke up again (which went to show how many times he had been sleeping recently), Gabriel turned to look blearily at his bedside table. Sitting there was a glass of water with some melting ice cubes and a giant 1-pound Sugar Daddy. While it was a little excessive, Gabriel smiled at the thought. Sam would've had to drive to a local candy store to get a big one like that instead of a gas station. He took a sip of water and suddenly realized how dry his throat was. Normally his vessel was kept healthy but with the injury to his Grace, he couldn't keep it in perfect condition. Gabriel was eager for himself to get better. 

 

Sam was sitting in a chair by the foot of his bed, reading with his feet tucked under himself like a kid. Some of his long hair fell in his face and Gabriel gave a quiet laugh at how sweet he looked. Sam's head shot up. 

 

"You're awake." He said plainly. "I got your um..." He trailed off and pointed at the candy. Gabriel didn't even look at it again.

 

"Cas said- he said you cleaned my wings." He said it like a question, hesitant and unsure. The feathers curved in around him, still partially draped across the bed. Sam swallowed.

 

"Yeah. I'm sorry if that was crossing a line I just wasn't sure if you'd want them to be so dirty like that, I shouldn't have done it without your permission." He rubbed the back of his neck and set his book down in his lap.

 

"No it's fine. I couldn't have cleaned them myself anyway." 

 

"Why not?"

 

"I can't reach in some places. Despite popular belief, angels are supposed to be social creatures like humans, or at least a little bit. We can't clean all of our wings on our own so we have others help. Grooming is actually a way angels bond. Cas and I would groom each others wings all the time when I was back Home." One wing had a stray feather that was slightly bent at the middle. Gabriel pinched the base and pulled the feather out with ease. Sam grimaced.

 

"Doesn't that hurt?"

 

"Not if you do it right." Gabe set the feather on the table next to his bed. Then picking up the candy Sam had brought he tore off the wrapper and attempted to shove the giant caramel stick in his mouth. Sam snorted with laughter. "What?"

 

"You're going to try and eat that whole thing? Seriously?" He raised an eyebrow and the corner of his mouth lifted into a smile.

 

"What?" Gabriel said with offense.

 

"Dude when you choke, don't come calling for me." Sam laughed, but the threat fell flat. He flipped the book around in his hand. Gabriel diverted his eyes and went back to enjoying his candy. Sam kept flitting his eyes back to him until he eventually just settled on reading his book again. The two settled into a comfortable silence and Gabe enjoyed having Sam there as company even if they weren't talking. The only sound was the quiet flipping of pages from Sam and the strange noises from Gabriel. When Sam reached his seventh chapter, he saw Gabriel had finished the Sugar Daddy and was now combing his fingers through his feathers absentmindedly. And he had never seen Gabriel be absentminded. 

 

Gabriel put such care into smoothing out each feather. He would start at the base of a feather and when he reached the tip, a little cloud of sparkling dust burst out. Gabe was repeating that with every feather. Sam watched with amazement as he slowly but surely made his plumage shinier. By the time Gabriel finished his first wing, he had noticed Sam staring. The golden feathers fluffed out around him but not in the way that Sam had noticed the past couple of day. One wing cocked to the side while the other raised itself a little. 

 

"What?" Gabe asked.

 

"Why do your feathers do that?" Sam finally asked. Gabriel froze. His mind was racing to find a lie.

 

"I don't know. I guess it's just like humans with arms." He said nonchalantly, leaning back. The gauze wrapped around his chest tightened as he moved and he immediately moved back to his previous sitting position.

 

Sam frowned but quickly hid his expression as Gabriel attempted to adjust his bandages. Why would Gabriel lie about knowing what his wings meant? The book had made it clear that angels were very private about it but Sam had hoped Gabriel might trust him a little more. But if Gabriel didn't want to talk about it then it wasn't Sam's business.

 

Gabriel snapped his fingers and for a brief second nothing happened and then a roll of bandages appeared in his hand.

 

"I was worried it would be more difficult than that." He muttered to himself, staring at his fingers. He tried to pull his shirt off over his head but couldn't manage it without his injuries crying out with a fiery pain. Sam held out a hand, an offering to help. Gabriel let him carefully pull the shirt off and unravel the first layer of bandages. Sam tossed them into the trash can. There was another layer of bandages, this time soaked with puss and dried blood. The deep brown of the blood made Gabriel sick to his stomach. He had bled. When cool air touched his open wound as Sam unwrapped the last bandage Gabriel hissed. Sam placed his hand next to Gabriel's as a silent invitation for him to squeeze it. Gabriel held his hand and when Sam applied some disinfectant he was afraid he might break Sam's fingers. He loosened his grip when Sam gingerly rolled fresh gauze over his chest and covered the gash once more. When he finished, Gabriel was able to put his shirt on by himself this time.

 

"Thanks for the help." He smiled genuinely at Sam who returned it in kind. 

 

"No problem man. If you hadn't decided to come along on the hunt, we all probably would've been dead. But that demon saw you and just made a beeline. If she hadn't wanted to torture and kill you we might've been dead a lot sooner." Sam winced at how crass the words sounded.

 

"What are friends for?" Gabe laughed. "I'd take getting tortured over seeing you guys get hurt any day. No question." He said earnestly. Sam made a wounded face but couldn't think of anything to say at first.

 

"You shouldn't let yourself get hurt. Not for our sakes." Sam said and Gabriel's heart jumped for a moment as he realized Sam's hand was covering his own again. "Gabriel, I know how you see yourself sometimes. I see the same thing in Dean. And I know it's hard to believe you're worthy of-" He searched for a word.

 

"Love?" Gabriel supplied. "Sam you guys are my family. And I know that. But sometimes," He sighed. "Sometimes it's hard to believe that after the things I did I'm worthy of all of you caring about me."

 

"Dean forgave you for Mystery Spot. You're great friends now. Cas is glad to have you back and you guys work to fix the time lost since you left Heaven. He's glad to have his older brother back." Sam pointed out.

 

"And you?" Gabriel almost didn't ask. 

 

"I think you are one of the best friends I have. And if I were ever to lose you I don't know what I would do." The honesty in Sam's voice almost broke Gabriel's heart. Sam himself wasn't sure why he suddenly was confessing this. It was dangerously close to that line he couldn't cross.

 

"Gabriel I need you. You're my family."

 

Gabriel sucked in a breath and was sure there were at least a few tears rolling down his cheeks. Sam pulled him into a hug which was nice until Gabriel gave a quiet yelp of pain from Sam crushing his wound. They gave quiet laughs. Sam wanted to brush the tears away from Gabriel's face but knew that he shouldn't. He settled for handing him a tissue instead. Gabe accepted it gratefully and wiped away the tears.

 

"Look at you Sammy, makin' an archangel cry." He chuckled and they both smiled.

 

Gabe held out his arms widely. Sam realized he was offering another hug and this time he was careful to avoid hurting Gabriel's wound. They didn't know how long they sat there, and they didn't care.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please leave a kudos or comment if you enjoyed, they're really what's helping me have the motivation to write these.


	8. Chapter 8

Hey everyone, I just wanted to say thank you for all the support so far. It has meant so much to write this for you and I’m glad you guys enjoy it. But I’m incredibly sorry for not posting anything these past few months, between family issues, returning to school, and other writing projects I haven’t been able to work on it at all.

I’m going to try and remedy that though. I’ll be hopefully posting more frequently with longer chapters. And if you enjoy them leave comments to give me feedback, it really improves my writing and helps me on the days it’s hard to understand inspiration.

Thanks everyone!


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want to thank you guys so much for the support you've given me while I've been writing this. Because honestly it's been really tough sometimes but you all inspire me to keep writing and creating content. I'm so sorry that it's been slow but I'm trying harder to write good chapters for you and in a reasonable time. Thanks for sticking with me!
> 
> And if you guys have any ideas for where you want this story to go please tell me in the comments, I come up with it all on the fly so I'd be more than happy to hear what you all want.

Over the next few days Gabriel withdrew. It's not that he was mad at Sam, he just felt uncomfortable having his wings out all the time around him. Sam was a smart man and even if he didn't know angelic body language he could certainly figure out how Gabriel was acting as a human. Gabriel was currently laboring under the excuse that he needed 'a few days away from you filthy hunters' but he knew that would only work for so long. He needed to be able to hide his wings again and soon. 

A couple of years ago he could have disappeared for months and no one would have worried about him. Especially not the Winchesters. But things weren't the same as they were back then. Now they actually cared about him and he felt like the Bunker was a proper home for him. Instead of flitting from continent to continent, Gabriel had a place to return to. It was a strange feeling but a welcome one.

Cas had convinced him to stay in the Bunker instead of his mansion but that didn't mean Gabriel didn't still keep his distance from the others. So that's how he found himself sneaking into the kitchen at an absolutely unholy hour for a midnight snack.

The refrigerator hummed quietly and as he opened it the room was bathed in its glorious light. Gabriel shoved aside the produce and beers to reach his stash of pudding cups. After piling enough in his arms and wings to sate his craving, Gabriel used a wing to carefully easy the fridge door closed. Just when he thought he had gotten away with it and was going to sneak back to his room, the kitchen light turned out.

Sam had his gun cocked but upon noticing the culprit, lowered it and gave a disapproving raised eyebrow. Gabriel laughed guiltily. A pudding cup slipped from his grip and fell on the floor. Caught red-handed.

"Seriously?" Sam said, acting unamused but Gabe could see the twinge of a smile on his face. As if he hadn't been close to shooting him a moment ago. But that's just the kind of friendship they had.

"I had a small dinner?" Gabriel said sheepishly.

Sam scoffed. "I know for a fact that that isn't true." He was right, Gabriel had snapped up a five-course meal just because he felt like it. 

"Whatever Mr. Vegetarian." He grumbled as he passed Sam in the doorway. He hoped not acknowledging it would stop Sam from noticing he still had the pudding cups. But luck was never on his side. Sam snatched one of the cups from Gabriel's arms and he almost lost his grip on them all.

"I'm not a vegetarian." Sam scrunched up his nose and Gabriel bit back a laugh.

"Your diet says otherwise Lettuce Man."

Sam snorted. "We're back to name calling now? Okay shortie."

"Low blow."

"Not as low as you."

Gabriel stuck his tongue out at him. In truth he didn't mind the height jokes. Mostly because his true form was taller than Sam could even dream of being. Even Cas was short compared to him. Granted his older brothers were taller than all of them but Gabriel had stopped caring about that long ago.

"Such a child." Sam said. Gabe found it strange that years ago that would have been said with fury and anger about a prank gone wrong while they were adjusting to their new archangel buddy. Now it was laced with laughter and affection. He felt warmed to have such amazing friends. 

Suddenly he winced and clutched his hand to his chest as a sharp pain shot through him. Gabriel dropped the pudding cups as he tried to ride out the pain. Sam placed a hand on his shoulder. "I'm okay. Probably hurt a muscle on accident." Gabe hoped he hadn't made his injuries worse. Yeah they were healing but very slowly. It was driving him crazy. As if he needed another reminder of how vulnerable he was now.

"Maybe you should take it easy." Sam said with a frown. 

"Gee Samsquatch I feel honored that you care so much." Gabriel teased. Sam rolled his eyes in a typical Sam fashion.

Gabriel straightened up as the pain faded gradually. He stooped to pick up his pudding and Sam joined him. Gabe offered him a smile. It was so strange to him. Sam showing friendship and being comfortable enough around him to not act awkward about anything. He used to be either pissy or wary of the archangel and his haphazard magic. Gabriel shook his head to himself. He didn't understand why he was dwelling on those past years so much. He'd changed and the boys had too. 

"I've been meaning to ask." Sam cut into the silence. Yikes that suddenly hyped up Gabriel's nerves. "You seem a little more out of it than normal. I haven't seen you leave your room in days. At least not when we're around."

Gabriel's mouth pulled into a grimace before he turned it into a smile. "I've just got a bit of that good old cabin fever. But you boys haven't gone on a hunt in nearly that long so I can't get out much can I." He pointed out. Sam's face was unreadable for a moment. Gabe didn't find that to be a good sign. Sam was very readable, all the time. He was either in murder mode on hunts or happy mode at home. Gabe liked the latter best.

"Do you want to go out?" Gabriel's heart stuttered at Sam's words. "You know stretch your wings a bit, metaphorically and physically." And the other shoe dropped.

"Oh. Yeah, sure. Let's get the dust off these puppies." He shook his wings out and ruffled them high above his head so clouds of dust fell around them. A practical effect but amusing nonetheless. Gabe left his pudding begrudgingly on the kitchen table and followed Sam through the library to the bunker's entrance. 

Chilled air greeted them as they stepped outside. Sam pretended not to be bothered by it but Gabriel noticed the goosebumps he had gotten. With a nonchalant snap of his fingers, Sam suddenly was dressed in a thicker jacket and a red scarf with gold tassels. Gabe thought maybe the tassels were overdoing it but shrugged because it was too late at this point. He saw Sam smile at him graciously. Gabe himself quickly donned a similar outfit even though he couldn't get cold. It was better than walking outside in pajama pants. 

His wings dragged along the half frozen ground, feathers gently sweeping dead leaves aside unintentionally. Winter was on it's way and Gabriel didn't mind. Something about it was welcoming to him. He found himself following Sam on the trail he recognized to be Sam's morning jog path. Absolutely atrocious. Actually doing exercise. Still, he loved the fool.

Gabe quickly banished that from his mind. He came from a species that could read minds of others if they really tried. He'd learned to hide his thoughts long ago even if they were in no danger of being invaded. Old habits die hard in the worst ways. He didn't want to think about loving Sam right now. He couldn't deny it but that didn't mean he had to deal with it. 

Gabriel couldn't pretend he didn't fear rejection either. Despite everything, there were some walls he hadn't ever managed to break down. Even Kali, as much as he loved her once, never got him to open up to her. Not that she cared about that aspect. He didn't trust as easily anymore and certainly wasn't ready to confess his love to the one person who he somehow had began to trust more than any other being. It wasn't simple. 

The trees suddenly seemed a lot closer. Looming in towards him. Sam didn't appear to notice a change. Gabe's feathers bristled uneasily. He needed to fly. 

Gabriel snatched Sam up around the waist and before he could protest, shot into the air like a bullet. Sam made a strangled noise but was quickly cut off as they soared above cloud level. Gabe attempted to ignore the way Sam was clutching him even though he was the shorter of the two. 

"Gabe! What are you doing?" He shouted above the wind. Gabriel didn't know how to answer him. Sam seemed to understand and turned to stare at his wings. He clearly wanted to ask something but decided against it. Gabriel felt thankful. He didn't feel like talking.

They dipped beneath the clouds again and Gabriel could see the closest town nearing them. He landed on the roof of a Burger King. Sam turned to him as he strode across the roof. Gabriel hid his face hurriedly. 

"What'd you bring us here for?" Sam asked. Gabe didn't answer. He just pulled his jacket closer in around him. He became painfully aware of the tears that had started to fall down his cheeks without his permission. He tried to will them away but they continued to spill in his frustration. Sam put a hand on his shoulder and turned him around to face him. 

Gabe felt hot shame burn on his face. The look of shock Sam wore gave Gabriel another wave of embarrassment. Sam had never seen him cry. Only Cas ever had in his few moments of weakness. Gabe expected Sam to say something, but instead he found himself being wrapped in a hug. Sam's chin rested on his head and for once Gabe didn't make a quip about him being so damn tall.

Gabriel didn't even realize that he had sunk to the ground, his knees buckling under him. Sam just wordlessly clung to him as they sat on the rooftop. The archangel's head was buried in Sam's chest, sobs racking his body. Sam's hand was stroking Gabriel's hair comfortingly. It reminded him all too well of the times his older brothers would comfort him as a fledgling. Instead of the memory making Gabriel feel sick, Sam made him feel genuinely better. 

When his crying died down he pried his face from Sam's tear stained jacket. Gabriel didn't meet his eyes guiltily. Sam's chin still was on his head and Gabe didn't mind. He could hear the rumbling in his chest as he spoke. "Do you want to talk about it?" Sam asked quietly. Gabe was about to shake his head. But part of him knew he couldn't keep it in forever. All his life he'd spent running from problem after problem. But his time with the Winchesters had taught him that he needed to open up about it at some point. Or it might cause some end of the world problem. Damn those boys were bad at communication.

"Sam." He looked into his multicolored eyes. Gabe never stopped being fascinated by the way they never seemed to decide what shade they wanted to be. Sam offered a soft smile of encouragement. 

"I need help." Gabe said in a half whisper. "I can't do this alone. I've been alone for so long I-" He stopped himself before the words rushed out. "I've spent so much of my life alone and hiding part of myself that I'm not sure who I am anymore. I have insecurities and walls I've built. My wings may make me vulnerable now but that doesn't mean I haven't felt vulnerable for a long time." The truth poured out. Sam listened intently. "I don't want to isolate myself. I don't want to be alone. But I don't know how not to be either."

There was a beat of silence. Gabriel's anxiety skyrocketed as Sam hesitated to speak. "Gabe. I can't tell you something that will make you feel better magically. I can't snap my fingers and make everything alright. But I'll always, always, be there for you. Nothing you could do would stop that. You don't need to be alone. And it may take time but you don't need to rush things. We'll all be there for you." Gabe noticed the parallel from the last time he spoke to Sam like this.

That reminder that he wasn't alone. 

It almost made him cry again.

He raised his fingers and snapped. A fleece blanket appeared beneath them on the roof. Gabriel untangled himself from Sam's hug, as much as it pained him to, and lay on his back. Sam followed suit.

The stars above them seemed much clearer than he remembered through the light pollution. He could point out millions of constellations. Gabe connected them mentally and wove the sky with a web of threads. 

Some days he missed Heaven so badly he could physically feel the pain. But there was that knowledge in the back of his mind that the Heaven he once knew was no more. Back then there was culture and tradition. Angels didn't have free will but there was something. He couldn't quite find the word. Now all that had been there was gone. Culture and tradition were forgotten. And his family was torn apart.

Michael and Lucifer in the cage. 

Uriel and Raphael dead.

Why couldn't he have a normal functioning family?

Gabriel looked over at Sam who stared at the stars, entranced. A smile twinged at the corner of his mouth and Gabe could see his dimples. His wings spread out behind him as the feathers ruffled. He didn't care.

He didn't know about normal, but family he did have.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> While I've been neglecting to post here, I have several other projects on my Wattpad. I'd be so grateful if you guys were to check them out too because I put a lot of love into those stories. My Wattpad is Spacenerdjpeg.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Listen y'all I know it's been a while but I’m going to crank out some more chapters ASAP. It’s probably going to finish next chapter or the one after that though, I’m sorry to say. Don’t worry though cause I’ll either make a mini series after or write a new fic with recommendations from you guys!
> 
> Also the past few weeks while working through my personal stuff (Thanks so much for the support!) I've been putting in multiple hours (71 to be precise) on a tech job for a musical leaving me absolutely no time to write. So I'm cranking this one out today since the show ended.
> 
> Sorry for all the waiting loves, I hope these are worth the wait.

Fuck sweaters. Don't get him wrong, Gabriel could enjoy a comfortable sweater when he wasn't wearing his signature outfit. Although it was definitely easier to just keep on the olive green jacket, he'd started to wear baggy sweaters to hide his wings while he searched for a solution. And having his wings trapped like that was a whole new level of uncomfortable. They didn't allow his wings almost any room to move and Gabriel would spend at least twenty minutes wrestling to get them tucked in the first place. Which sometimes could result in him falling off his bed and hitting his head on the floor with a sweater half pulled over his head. Coincidentally at the same Sam walked into his room. So fuck sweaters.

Through the head hole of the sweater Gabe could just barely see Sam's shoes in his doorway. Suddenly he was glad the sweater hid the rest of his face from the flush that had risen abruptly. Not his finest moment. 

"Everything alright?" Sam said, as if he wondered whether or not he should ask in the first place. 

"I'm fine. Perfectly fine Samsquatch."

"So I have some good news." Sam strode over to him and before Gabriel could realize what was happening, he was being pulled to his feet. A moment later the sweater was pulled down completely over his head so he could finally see. He wished it hadn't because he was definitely visibly blushing at this point. Sam was at least 5 inches away from him, still fixing his sweater.

"Good news?" Gabriel croaked out. Smooth. Sam looked up at him.

"Your face is red. Are you okay?"

"I was just hanging off my bed, I've got some blood rush, sue me." Sam rolled his eyes.

"Anyway," Sam said,"the good news is, I may have found a lead on how we can hide your wings again." Gabriel's eyes widened. After such a long time he finally had some hope of hiding his problem. It had grown further than just the threat of Sam realizing his feelings. At this point, Gabe was also worried about how the rest of his time on Earth would be. He couldn't just hang around with humans anymore with wings protruding from his back. Which was probably not the best thing to keep some people from screaming and kicking him in the junk. Mistakes had been made. Lessons had been learned.

"It involves finding the witch that cast the spell in the first place." Sam explained. Gabe's heart sank.

"She could be anywhere by now. One doesn't exactly curse and archangel without expecting some sort of punishment. She's probably long gone. She slipped away that day the minute she could."

Sam shook his head. "Gabe you're an archangel. You can track her."

Gabe paused. "Oh. Yeah."

"We can get her to reverse the spell with you providing the angelic assistance."

"And if she refuses?" Gabriel asked, moving to the door.

"We'll make her." 

Gabe considered it. It almost seemed too easy. But he wasn't one to look a gift horse in the mouth. 

"Thanks Sam. For everything." Gabe said with sincerity. Sam smiled at him.

"No problem." Sam clapped him on the shoulder before walking past him out the door. Gabriel watched him leave. Feathers were poking out of his sweater, still not very well adjusted. He cursed the fluffy feathers bitterly. Soon this would all be over and he could go back to successfully hiding any trace of his feelings for Sam. 

He sighed. Part of him wanted to tell Sam. Might as well get it over with. But if Sam rejected him Gabriel didn't know what he'd do. He wasn't exactly the best at dealing. He ran a hand through his hair. He couldn't lose Sam. Couldn't lose one of the best friends he had. The Winchester's had given him a second chance, a family he could rely on. And Gabriel wasn't about to give it all up for some silly crush.

Ugh but it was more than a crush. Gabriel was head-over-heels in love. It had been building over years and it got to the point even Cas could see it. Maybe he was more obvious than he thought. Which means the wings weren't entirely his problem. They would just delay the inevitable. Either way he had to hide them again. He stroked the feathers gently, their vibrant color swirling like liquid gold in the light of the hallway. There was a bent feather on the underside of his right wing. Gabriel pulled it out carefully by the shaft and watched as its color turned lackluster and duller than before. He dropped it and watched as it fluttered to the floor.

 

\- - -

 

Sam was still dwelling on his conversation with Gabriel a few hours later. The archangel hadn't exactly acted very cheerful since then. He'd act like his usual self one minute, laughter on his tongue and a joke on his mind, and then the next his face would drop the moment he was sure no one could see. But Sam saw. There wasn't much about that tiny golden menace he didn't notice. Something was bothering him. Had been bothering him since his wings had been revealed. And yeah, sure that's an obvious reason to worry. An all powerful archangel being vulnerable. But Sam had a feeling it had something to do with what he saw in Gabriel's book. He hadn't been back to the library since that time and that had been almost two weeks ago. He needed to look at it again. To help Gabriel.

Was that his only motivation though? What if it was his curiosity driving him? Sam shook his head as he rounded the corner. He cared about Gabriel and his well-being even if the archangel didn't always understand it. Sam rubbed his eyes with his index finger and thumb, sighing heavily, when he suddenly noticed something on the ground. Outside of Gabriel's room was a feather, golden and shimmering like the ones on his wings. But it appeared much duller than the ones that Sam had stared at so much. As if some of the gold had been drained. He picked it up and twirled it between his fingers. It was still magnificent in the light but obviously not as splendid as the feathers Sam was so familiar with. 

Sam shoved the feather in his back pocket the moment he heard footsteps coming through the hall. Castiel came into view and frowned momentarily.

"Sam. Have you seen Gabriel?" He asked. Sam shook his head and furrowed his eyebrows.

"No. Is something wrong?"

Castiel shuffled awkwardly, obviously troubled. "I tried talking with him earlier about something..." He paused, giving a brief look at Sam, "But he flew off and now I'm not sure where he is. I'm very worried about him."

"What'd you talk to him about?" Sam asked, knowing the chance of Cas giving a truthful answer was slim, but he'd take slim over impossible anyday.

"Uhhh. I was asking him for-" Cas squinted as he came up with an answer, "romantic advice." Sam raised an eyebrow. He knew Cas was lying but was mildly entertained.

"Interesting. What kind of advice did you need?" Sam said, amused. 

Castiel looked to the side and shifted awkwardly again. "Um, I wanted to ask about romantic gestures. As I understand those are very helpful in strengthening a relationship." He paused. "I should go continue to look for him. If you find him, call me."

"Got it Cas." Sam grinned before Cas walked away. 

When Castiel disappeared from view, Sam's smile gradually faded. Even Cas was admitting something was off about Gabriel's behavior. Castiel wasn't as oblivious as some may think but he was very reserved when it came to the bond he and his brother had. After so many years assuming Gabriel was dead, Cas had had a hard time accepting he was back, even after he redeemed himself. They had grown closer eventually. Sam knew how strong of a connection the two brothers had. Cas would defend Gabriel as much as Gabriel would defend him. So if Cas was openly saying Gabriel was acting different, it was definitely not good. 

Sam pulled the feather out of his pocket and considered it. The feather was bent slightly towards the tip. If he wanted to help Gabriel, he needed to learn more about his wings. He needed to find that book in his library again. 

Sam made up his mind and fished the key out of the front pocket of his jacket. He'd switched it around with his coats everyday so he'd always have it.

He insert the key in the lock of Gabriel's bedroom door. When he opened it, instead of the disorganized nest of a room, he entered the foyer of the mansion. Sam slipped the key back into his pocket and walked up the stairs. As he went he looked for signs of Gabriel's presence, in case he happened to be there right now. When he found nothing, Sam made a hasty beeline for the library. 

He opened the doors and felt almost glad to see the disarray of papers and books hadn't changed much in the time that had passed. 

He shuffled carefully through the mess, taking precaution not to move anything out of place. Sam was hopeful that Gabriel hadn't already put the book away, then he would never find it. His efforts were rewarded when he found it under a pile of candy wrappers. Gabriel didn't have a clue how to clean up. Sam was tempted to throw the trash away for him but he was trying to be stealthy. 

The encyclopedia was still marked with sticky notes and as Sam flipped through the pages to find the chapter he was searching for, one gave him a papercut. He hissed and shook it off. A thin line of blood appeared along the cut. Sam ignored it and continued looking for the chapter. He felt triumphant when he found the page. 

'Shamshiel took much convincing to delve this display to me. Puffed feathers means an angel feels strong romantic feelings in the presence of someone. It's very uncommon but I've noticed the display much with Shamshiel when she started openly showing her wings. I've begun to understand it as the angelic equivalent of expressing love. But angels are secretive in emotions once they begin to feel them so they may have difficulty controlling how their wings show around the object of their affections. Shamshiel has pointed out to me that angel wings can't be seen anyway so this is all highly irrelevant. Either way I promised I'd document this all for others.'

It took a solid 12 seconds for Sam to process. Gabriel was in love with someone? Someone in the bunker? Which left it between Dean and ... Sam. That was the only time his feathers were puffed like that. When he was in the bunker.

Except when they had visited the mansion together. And gone on that walk on Sam's jogging trail. Oh. 

Oh. Sam's heart stopped. Everything suddenly made sense. Gabriel’s whole behavior since this all started. He was so eager to hide his wings because they were revealing his secret. He’d been just as quiet about it as Sam. A small part of him that wasn’t stunned by this revelation was elated. Sam hadn’t had much time for proper romance with the kind of shit they dealt with on the daily, and the average lifespan of his dates wasn’t very long. So many things were running through his head, but Sam couldn’t care less. He had to find Gabriel. 

Years of keeping everything bottled up made rationality escape him with sensibility close behind. Sam used his phone to try and call Gabriel, hoping to ask where he was. He may have been an oblivious idiot until this point but he wasn’t too much of an idiot to confess his love over the phone. No answer. Sam frowned. Gabe always answered his phone. Only a few people ever called him so he considered calls important. Where could he be? 

Cas hadn’t known earlier either. Sam suddenly felt concerned. Concern turned to fear as he remembered the feather in his pocket. Had Gabriel gone to search for the witch on his own?

Sam returned to the bunker, moving so quickly that when he went to put the key back in his pocket, it slipped and clattered to the floor where he didn’t notice. He just had to find Gabe.

\- - -

Gabriel plucked out another feather. Curse these stupid things and everything they stood for. He wanted to tear them all out. Guess he shouldn’t wish too hard. Gabriel could tell there were feathers all over weaker at their bases. They were beginning to act like they would during a molt, except he was nowhere near his next molt and these were falling at an alarming rate. What kind of fresh bullshit had he stepped into? 

He snapped his fingers and managed to shove his wings into a university sweatshirt. He wasn’t sure why Stanford had first come to mind but he rolled with it anyway. It had taken him only about an hour to find the witch, she was hidden with flimsy wards hardly undetectable to an archangel. Gabe would have applauded her for the effort if she hadn’t been the one to get him in this mess in the first place. 

It hadn’t been very long since the case that started all of this. Gabriel remembered the brothers asking them to tag along for backup (which lo and behold, they actually needed), and how a coven of witches that had been practicing necromancy ended up having a very powerful leader. When Gabe first saw her she didn’t look much more than a terrified college student. His mind was quickly changed when the spell hit him. He didn’t even know what she had cast but it seemed to have done the trick since he was in this situation now. She had fled before he could get revenge. Gabriel could still remember her face as the spell landed on it’s mark. Frightened and alert.

And as the door opened in front of him, that same face greet him now.

Before the witch could slam the door on him, Gabriel held up a hand to hold it open. “I’m not going to bring down the righteous wrath of heaven on you. I just want a chat.” She gulped. But he must have looked as apathetic and weary as he felt because she slowly eased the door open the rest of the way for him. Gabriel took it as an invitation to step inside.

“How’d you find me?” She stammered, wide brown eyes staring at his every move. He settled on a couch in the living room carelessly.

“Archangel.” He simply pointed at himself. “The real question is what spell did you put on me and will you undo it?”

For a moment the witch frowned. “That’s two questions.” Then she immediately looked like she regret it. Gabe chuckled. She relaxed briefly before sitting in an armchair across from him, her feet tucked under her in an attempt to make her seem smaller. Gabriel found it endearing. Sam did something similar by hunching slightly. 

“Yeah it’s two but will you answer them?”

She bit her lip. “The spell was supposed to make emotions apparent. I haven’t been a witch for long and I mostly do stuff for my classmates. Slowly but surely I’ll pay off my loans.” She chuckled nervously. “I swear it wasn’t supposed to hurt you or anything. You startled me. It was just supposed to distract you for a bit. You guys were feeling very angry, and using that spell would cause that anger to show itself very obviously, hopefully leading to confusion and just giving me enough time to leave. I had no idea how it would affect an archangel. The coven, one of my friends is part of it. I was there that night because I was trying to convince her to leave, to practice light magic instead. Then you hunters showed up.”

So she was just defending herself. Gabriel suddenly felt a swell of pity for her. She wasn’t some powerful witch. She was just a kid in the wrong place at the wrong time. He sat forward.

“I’m sorry.” She looked up at his words.

“For what?”

“I came here planning to force you to hide my wings by any means necessary. But it’s my fault it happened at all. I’m 92% certain that the reason your spell did this to me because the only perfect way to make an angel’s emotions apparent is through their wings.” He sighed and ran a hand through his hair. “That’s why we could never find a reversal. It wasn’t Enochian.” The witch fiddled with the edge of her skirt and pulled at a curl of cinnamon colored hair with golden highlights.

“I can reverse it. If that’s what you want.” 

Gabriel smiled. “That’s the best damn thing I’ve heard all week.”

They stood up as the witch was about to lead Gabriel to what he assumed was the room she had her spell ingredients when she frowned at the couch. He looked back to see a pile of feathers had accumulated where he had been sitting. 

“That’s not good.” She grimaced. 

“Define ‘not good’.” 

She picked up a feather. “You haven’t been suppressing any of your feelings since this happened have you?”

Gabriel threw his hands in the air. “I’m the king of suppressing feelings!” He said with exasperation.

“Well I’m changing my diagnosis from not good to very not good. The kicker of that spell, which I hoped would have worn off quickly, is that if the victim suppresses their emotions it will hurt them physically. Now I’ve just started the practice so I didn’t think it could hurt anyone at all. It hasn’t in the past. But if you’ve got some serious shit bottled up…”

Gabriel pouted. “Fan-fucking-tastic. That’s just perfect. We’d better undo this fast.”

“No no no no no mister. If you’re this far with the suppression,” She held up a feather, “you need to do some extreme change. I’m talking letting it all out. Go to therapy if that’s what you need but you definitely gotta do something. Until then if I were to do anything to reverse it, you’d probably die.”

“Festive.” Gabriel grumbled. “Fine. I’ll give you my number just in case anything bad happens.”

“Anything worse.” She corrected. They switched phones and he smiled at the name she’d entered as a contact. “Marcia?”

“What, got a problem with my name?”

“No, I just knew a Marcia once. Cool chick. Really rocked that ‘I’m better than you’ll ever be and you know it’ look.” 

“Hope I live up to the name then.” Marcia grinned at him. Gabe in the moment didn’t realize this kid reminded him a lot of someone else. Maybe it was the golden hair.


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hehe

So I know I promised a new chapter to wrap this all up after two years guys but...

I've decided to rewrite the whole thing instead. 

I want to go deeper with the storyline and make a ton of changes and longer more fleshed out chapters. 

Don't worry, I'll post a finishing chapter to this in case you just want to end it and be done. But I've put a lot of thought into this (2 seconds on a whim of inspiration lol) and since it was so difficult to continue from a place that started with writing from two years ago and now I have a better idea of what I want to do with it I'm going to rewrite it. 

I won't delete this but leave comments on ways you think I could make it better in the rewrite. 

Thanks for sticking with me everyone, I'm so grateful for everything! <3


	12. Chapter 12

Gabriel remembered falling in love. 

He never considered love to be easy. Over the millennia there were plenty of beings he had fallen in love with and each time was special in his heart. Because occasionally through his isolation and the way he hid himself from the world there would be someone to break through. He had built walls so tall and strong it was surprising anyone had ever been let in. And after every heartbreak Gabriel rebuilt them. Kali was the last one to cause that heartbreak but the damage to his heart had healed years ago. That was when he made the decision that he couldn’t let anyone in again. Not after his brothers and the apocalypse. After Elysian Fields where he felt himself dying in that hotel. Not after he had been hurt time and time again, not knowing when he’d learn his lesson. 

But there was always an exception. The one exception to everything in his life. Sam had come and torn down every last one of his walls, destroyed the rubble, and tore up the blueprints for an elaborate defense fortress. Okay maybe he got a little into his own metaphor but the point still stood. 

The last few years were like a blip in the span of Gabriel’s life and yet they seemed to matter the most of all. 

With Gabriel’s luck he should have seen it coming. That crush in the back of his mind he kept out of the way of his friendship. This is why you don’t piss off love gods. Part of him suspected they had a hand in this misfortune.

Two years after Gabriel had joined the self-proclaimed Team Free Will, there had been a day they just needed to rest. His idea of a proper vacation had been derailed because ‘what if an important case came up?’ He and Dean both called bull but Sam had that damned face that could make both of them feel like disobedient children who had to listen to the adult. He wasn’t sure he liked that feeling. Either way, it resulted in an impromptu karaoke competition, several failed attempts to start a bar fight (what could he say, he didn’t have anything strong enough to get himself drunk on hand and he was getting bored) and one successful attempt that ended with them sprinting four blocks away from the bar. Instead of flying. Even Cas seemed a bit caught up in the moment, grinning like an idiot and giving Gabriel a sudden reminder as to how much Cas truly took after him by the mischievous glint in his eye. The fluff ball would cause chaos of his own later in the night but that was a disaster for another day. What Gabriel had focused on the most was when they all ended up stopping to catch their breath in an alley. The two angels obviously didn’t have to, but they paused for their friends. 

“Gabriel—“ Dean wheezed. “You are one crazy asshole.” He laughed between breaths. Gabriel bowed dramatically. 

“We are never going to be able to go back there.” Sam was doubled over trying to catch his breath but Gabe caught the smile anyways. 

“Next time we’ll use disguises. Ooh I’ve got a box full of fake mustaches we can try!” Cas raised an eyebrow at him before he could snap his fingers and Gabriel lowered the hand he had raised with mock shame.

“I don’t think the target practice was necessary.” Castiel said to him. Gabriel chuckled.

“Sure it was. The perv was harassing every woman in view. Least he deserved was a few mini umbrellas thrown at him.” 

Sam walked up to them. “Sharpened?” He asked teasingly. 

“Definitely.” Gabriel grinned. “Here we drink our respecting women juice everyday!” Blank faces greeted him. “That joke will be relevant a few years too late, never mind.”

“I think you missed the mark.” Dean pointed at an uncomfortable looking mini drink umbrella jammed in his thigh. The adrenaline from the fight and run must have worn off enough for him to notice. Humans were so weird like that. 

“Sorry Deano, never been great at darts.” That was a lie he was fantastic at darts. But modesty and all that. “Cas why don’t you go help him out.” Gabriel suggested with a subtle-not-so-subtle wink. Cas glared at him and Gabriel gave him a cheeky smile and a thumbs up. They disappeared around the corner.

“You never quit.” Sam said with a half smile, shaking his head and looking to the sky. 

“He’s my brother, he deserves to find love. The world we’ve seen, the things we’ve done, sometimes we need someone to take all that stuff away, to make us remember what we fight for. Love of all kinds does that. And I’d say that’s some pretty cheesy love right there. After the shit they’ve been through don’t you think they deserve it?” Gabe asked. “Plus Dean follows him around like a lovesick puppy and it makes me want to vomit.”

“You literally just said- never mind.” Sam chuckled. “That was pretty deep up until the- you know.”

Gabriel smiled. “I’m a romantic that’s lived through billions of years. I’ve dated a few poets.” Sam nodded thoughtfully. “Although, that, was all me.” He mused slowly. 

Sam looked at him quizzically. “Sounds like you just regurgitated every generalized idea of what humanity exists for in a few sentences.”  
“And where do you think those generalized ideas started Sammy?” He teased, giving him a light jab on the side. Sam made a face and leaned against the alley wall, his head towards the stars. Gabriel found a place beside him.

“Sometimes, when I was a teenager and I’d get to go on hunts with Dad and Dean, I’d go outside of whatever bug-infested motel we were in and just stare at the stars. I would-“ He gave a quiet bittersweet laugh, “I would map them and try and memorize them. So when we’d finish the case, I could go to the library and compare them to star charts. Being a kid, I wanted to see these incredible lights up close but once you learn what they really are and how difficult it is to get there... It’s a hard dream to hold onto.”

Gabriel watched the details of his face. The way that long hair kept falling in his face and it was just long enough to tuck behind his ears. How Sam’s eyes took on a quality of life that was difficult to notice some days, because he had been through so much. The faint dimples and hints of scars that were barely there because the Winchesters had some sort of anti-scar gene or something. 

“I’ll take you there.” He heard himself say. Sam looked at him and Gabriel suddenly felt his chest constrict in a way it never had before. “I can take you up to see them some day, the way angels do. It might take a bit of magical work, but I’m sure I could swing it given time.” Gabriel momentarily thought he was going to be sick because Sam was staring at him with this incredulous look on his face, like Gabe had given him the world and then he realized it wasn’t illness, it was those metaphorical butterflies in his stomach. Because he had caused that unbridled joy, that childish delight in Sam. He had made him happy like that. And suddenly all those times he had pulled out his silliest, stupidest pranks just to see Sam’s smile made sense. He wanted to do that for the rest of time and existence itself. Gabriel always thought that the only way he fell in love was quick and with a rose tinted vision, like the world drifted by in a dream. But this was slow and grounding and he had never felt more awake.

He remembered falling in love and now he was nearing the ground. Because his secret would be out. He was dying and the only way to stay alive would be to lay all his cards out on the table. Gabriel once would have made the choice to die instead of talking about his feelings but now he couldn’t do that. Cause he had people to live for and hearts that he couldn’t break. Drama queen or not he wasn’t going to let the people he loved get hurt this time. Not because of him.

And if it meant losing the greatest thing that had ever happened to him...

Gabriel had been around since the beginning of Earth. He had seen humanity evolve, seen what it was capable of and more. And yet Sam had been the one to give him the world. To show him all he thought he knew and beyond that. 

So yeah this could go horribly wrong. It probably would go horribly wrong. But even if Sam didn’t return his feelings, he was the kind of person to want to stay friends, and he’d rather have Sam Winchester stay his best friend and nothing more than have Sam Winchester grieving over a dead friend.

All of this, of course, had run through Gabriel’s mind within .o27 seconds as he flew to his home-away-from-home-mansion. 

When he landed, Gabriel found the foyer to be empty. Which was good for him considering he had given Sam a key. He still needed a minute or two to calm himself down before he made the most important decision of his life. Well one of them. (Some exciting weekends had been had). As he had left Marcia the witch’s house, he had found out Sam called him. Sam hadn’t answered when Gabe had tried to return the call but he left him a voicemail asking him to meet him at the mansion. 

Now Gabriel had to sit and wait as a nervous ball of anxiety. He could physically feel his wings shaking. He paced the length of each hall an excessive amount. At one point he found himself walking upside down off of the ceiling. 

In other news, he was great at emotions. 

The moment he felt his phone go off in his pocket, Gabriel made a mildly inhuman noise and fell off the ceiling, promptly landing on one wing and his shoulder. He groaned with annoyance and pain before taking out his phone and looking at the caller ID. Cas. He answered with a huff.   
“What’s up bucko?” He barely tried to hide his annoyance. 

“Oh good you’re alive. Look, Gabriel we’ve all been worried about you because you aren’t anywhere to be found and...” He heard Cas sigh on the other end of the line. “Sam found a feather outside of your room. Gabriel you only molt in the summer. It’s spring. If something’s wrong-“

“Cas could you trust me for a moment.” There was a pause before Cas made a noise of agreement. “I’ve messed up really badly and I’m going to try to make things better. Just tell Sam to meet me at my place, he knows where, if he hasn’t already gotten my voicemail.” 

“Gabriel.” His finger hovered over the end call button. “Please don’t do anything too... Gabriel-like.” 

Gabe laughed, trying to force down a sudden cough that came with it. “Sure thing Cas. Pinky-promise.” He hung up and the moment he did so a sudden coughing fit erupted and he doubled over in the fetal position where he had landed from the ceiling. When the coughing relented, Gabriel stared at the hand he had used to cover his mouth. Thick golden liquid was smeared across his palm. Ichor. The blood of Greek Gods, or so humans believed. All pagans bled ichor, the Greeks were the only ones who were known for it. And his time as Loki had definitely altered him. 

Marcia was right. He never should have repressed his feelings this much. Sucks that it was the thing he was best at. 

Gabriel pushed himself off of the floor and wiped his hand on his pants. The ichor stained the denim. He ignored the pile of feathers that lingered behind him on the ground where had had been. He continued to ignore their glimmer that seemed to mock him as he walked towards the courtyard doors.

 

***

 

Sam felt his blood run cold. Gabriel didn’t seem to realize he was on speaker and as Cas kept giving him almost pitiful glances, Sam knew he shouldn’t let Gabriel know he was present. Gabe had been serious, almost regretful sounding. And he had definitely heard that horrible cough towards the end before Gabe hung up. 

“Do you have any theories about what’s wrong with him, something angelic?” He asked Cas, bordering on frantic. Cas shook his head, just as concerned.

“No, and I can’t be sure if this is tied to the spell the witch put on him either. I don’t know what he’s hiding. We should go to him like he asked you to.” Sam didn’t object to Cas offering to come along. His love confession could wait if it meant helping Gabe. He pulled the key out of his pocket and gestured for Cas to follow him to the nearest door. Sam created a doorway to the mansion with Cas in tow. When they stepped through, Sam stared at a trail of feathers strewn across the floor. Cas followed his gaze and exchanged a worried glance with Sam. They stirred slightly, swirling around their feet as the two followed the path that lead to the courtyard. Sam entered the courtyard.

Gabriel was sprawled across a bench, his wings draped over the mulch and landscaping. A sizable pile of feathers had begun to collect. Gabe raised his head slowly when he heard them approach. Cas rushed to his side. 

“Gabriel!” He said urgently. Cas attempted to carefully raise his wings up but Gabriel made a pained noise and Cas stopped. Cas began to murmur words softly to him in Enochian. Gabe responded in kind, his eyes locking on Sam, who stood by the entrance, not sure what to do. Then he looked back at Cas who shook his head. “Now it’s my turn to call you an idiot.” He murmured quietly as he helped Gabriel sit upright. 

Sam’s brain finally caught up from the shock and he knelt beside Gabe, mirroring Cas on his other side. “What happened?” He asked. Gabe’s gaze grew soft on him. Sam didn’t look down at the hand that placed itself over his own.

“Sorry kiddo. I might be too late.” He said with a weak smile. Sam suddenly noticed how pale Gabe appeared. It seemed to be getting worse with every passing second. He was dying. 

“Gabe.” Sam’s voice broke a little. He had so many questions and definitely not enough time to get answers if Gabe was getting worse this quickly. “How long?” Was all he settled for.

“Do I have left or has this been happening?” 

“The second.”

“A while. It just got this bad today. I’ve been a bit anxious about something.” Gabe bit his lip. “My mistake.” He sighed and Sam could hear a haunting rattle in his chest. Gold tainted his lips and Sam could see more of the shimmering color splattered across his shirt and pants, like it had been wiped there. Gabe lifted his head. A determined glint flashed across his honey colored eyes. “I need to talk to you. Alone.”

He exchanged a look with Cas and after a moment Cas relented and stood up to leave. Once he was out of range of the courtyard Sam sat up on the bench next to Gabe, as opposed to kneeling in front of him. “Talk to me. Tell me how I can help. Cause you’re not dying here. You can’t-“ His voice definitely broke this time. 

“I still need to show you the stars.” Gabe whispered. Sam looked down at him. “I remember.” He said without Sam saying a word. 

“Yeah you do.” Sam smiled. “So let me help. There’s gotta be a way.”

Gabriel took in a shaky breath. “I-“ He looked like he was about to rush out a string of words but a bout of coughs wracked his body. Gabriel was doubled over. Between coughs he managed to get out a few words. “Call Marcia.” Sam hurriedly fished through his pockets for Gabe’s phone. He scrolled through the contacts as quickly as possible, heart sinking the worse Gabe sounded. After two rings, Marcia picked up.

“Hello all powerful archangel who chose not to kill me. How may I help you?”

“Are you Marcia?” Sam asked, frantic.

“Yeah, is Gabriel alright?” She seemed to sense the panic in his voice. 

“No, he’s dying. I don’t know how to help him. Please, he told me to call you.” Sam pleaded. Marcia swore on the other end of the line.

“He knows the only way is to do what I told him. I can’t help him from here.” Sam shut his eyes tightly.  
“Thanks. Bye.” He said curtly and hung up. Gabe’s coughing seemed to have subsided but he looked like death. His head lolled to the side. “Gabe. Stay with me.” He pushed the hair out of Gabriel’s face, cupping it gently. “Keep your eyes open. Let me see those eyes.” Gabriel’s eyes blinked open. “There we go. I love seeing those eyes. You’re going to be okay.” Sam noticed Gabe perk up at his slip. It hadn’t gone under the radar like he hoped. Nothing missed Gabe’s notice even when he was incapacitated. But Gabe didn’t seem to be visibly upset.

“Hey Sam.” A small light flickered in the deep wells of honey. 

“Yeah Gabe?”

“You’re gonna be the death of me kiddo.” Gabe whispered, settling his head on Sam’s shoulder. He seemed content for a moment, letting out a quiet breath before slumping against Sam. 

The light flickered out and Sam’s heart broke in half.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two things:  
> This chapter is exactly 3000 words and it makes me weirdly happy   
> Final chapter is coming soon, I was working on both, thus the delay
> 
> Second thing: Don’t be mad, the death is temporary so please don’t riot


End file.
